I just got back from a luncheon, held to honor high school seniors for their outstanding academic achievement. My son is being scouted by colleges, and though there was definitely a pitch in there for the kids to go to the school that was hosting the luncheon, it was also a nice little recognition of the work they had done in school.
I am not a fan of participation rewards. I don't think every kid should get a trophy just for showing up. I do think that recognizing accomplishment is a big thing though. And it's personal. What is a big deal for one person (kid or adult), may not be to another. Everyone should get recognized for the things they excel at, and the things they have worked hard for.
There are a lot of people who go through life without being acknowledged for the things they do, and to me this is sad. Someone may be a super hard worker, put everything they have into the things they do, but because their job is menial or because they aren't the top seller or the name that everyone recognizes, they go unseen.
My son does really well in school, often without trying. While I do congratulate him on that, we both also know that it's something that just happens for him. The things I choose to acknowledge more often are the things that I know don't come easy for him. When he suggests changing when we do the housework, because he has other plans, instead of putting it off and then complaining because he has chores, I let him know that I'm proud of him.
I also try to make sure the people in my life know that I not only see the things they do, but that I appreciate them. I think sometimes, that recognizing the little things can carry more weight than celebrating the big ones. I've expressed this idea when it comes to things like Valentines Day and Anniversaries: by all means celebrate them, but don't let that be the only time you let the other person know how much you mean to them.
Even something as little as a thank you can make someone's day. As much as I love cooking for my family, it can sometimes be a long, tedious process. I don't always feel like doing the prep work, or taking the time to make dinner. But it always makes me smile and feel glad I did when hubby or son tell me it tastes good. Even if it's something simple.
One place that we may find it hard to honor our accomplishments is in the spiritual realm. Not only are many of us solitary, but it feels sort of counter-intuitive to more or less brag about our spiritual life. Or we may even feel silly being proud about something that we feel like we should have mastered ages ago, but we really struggled to get a handle on.
I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to recognize making progress in your spiritual path! In fact, I think that pausing to honor our path and the steps we are taking along it, can be an important part of our growth. Sometimes, it doesn't feel like you have actually gotten anywhere until someone else tells you that you've done a good job. It's like we're programed to not trust our own judgement. Having someone else (or many people!) congratulate you, really helps it sink in that you did it!
I also think that if I am struggling with something, then there is also someone else out there struggling. If I share my store, really being open about how hard it was for me to learn or get good at something, not only does it let other people help me celebrate my victory, it helps let other people who may not have figured it out themselves see that they aren't the only one who has struggled with it...and that there is hope for them too!
So many parts of our life have markers for different levels of accomplishment. In school you may earn awards, and there are graduation ceremonies. In many clubs you earn badges or stamps or collect stickers for passing different benchmarks. Your job my recognize numbers of years served, a set amount of sales made or a certain number of successful projects. Why not have a similar plan for your spiritual life?
Some of my favorite books include a plan of study. I like having things laid out in a logical order. But this also gives me goals and benchmarks. Many times, if there is an exercise given, there is either an amount of time you are supposed to dedicate towards it (once a day for a month, or until you can do it for 30 minutes straight), or some other tangible level of 'being done'. This makes for easy places to celebrate your progress.
But it is also something you can come up with on your own, for whatever it is you are studying, working on or working through! Whatever your path is, think about where you are at right now and where you are headed. Come up with both long and short term goals, and break those down into steps. You may set dates for when you want those steps to be done by, or you may leave it undated and go with a more fluid "it will be done when it's done" approach. But think about different places along the way that you might consider celebrating.
And then plan some sort of celebration...and sharing that celebration with at least one other person! How you celebrate may change depending on what type of goals you had. If you wanted to finish a year and a day study of your chosen path, you might have a big celebration planned at the end. If you want to do a daily draw every day for a month, you might plan a smaller recognition of making your goal. You may even feel like inviting other people to join you on your challenge and make it a group celebration! This works really well for group study, whether it is a group that meets in person or only online.
Some accomplishments may be so very private that you may feel you don't want to share at all. I would challenge you to still share, at least in part, with someone who is very dear to you and who you trust. You don't have to tell them all the nitty-gritty details, but you can at least tell them that you were working through some stuff, and that you feel you have made real progress and that you want to honor that. Just having someone there, to hear and support you, can be a huge booster.
And if you are really struggling, you may want to honor that as well. Sometimes our accomplishments aren't that we won, but that we persevered! If you have been really working on something, and it's just not turning out the way you thought it would, you might gather together some friends, especially anyone who has been through something similar, and honor your experiences by sharing what you have been struggling with. You may find that, by talking it out, you walk away with a new approach. Or at the very least, with a new resolve to keep trying...and people who are cheering you on!
Lots of things in life are hard, and it is easy to get discouraged or to feel like you are just lost in the shuffle. Taking the time to stop and acknowledge what you have been doing, and celebrate yourself and the people around you helps lighten the load and gives you energy to continue onward and upward! Celebrating other people can bring surprising benefits to our own lives. And allowing other people to celebrate us, gives them that same opportunity! So look at your life, see what you have been up to that deserves a little spotlight...and celebrate it!
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