Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Own what you like!

Life is short, and there is no reason to shackle yourself with other people's judgements about the things that bring joy into your life!  We live in an amazing, versatile, crazy world, and there is a fan group for about anything you can imagine.  If you like it, odds are someone else does too!

Of course odds are that anything you like, other people will dislike as well.  And if the things you like veer at all from the very well paved and traveled mainstream, you will likely face all kinds of people trying to belittle you or even stop you from enjoying the things you like.  You will almost certainly see more of these people than you do of people who share your interests, and some who agree with you might not speak up, because they are afraid, worried about what everyone else will say if they admit they like the same things.

It's a sad fact that many people seem to derive enjoyment out of tearing other people down.  But it is also a fact that small groups, who are unabashedly claiming the things that make them happy, can create change.  The more society sees a thing, the more likely they are to accept it.  They may never like it, and the more it pushes people's buttons, the more they will push back, but also the more that it will encourage people who agree to join with you.

I also feel that sometimes people draw away from things simply because they don't understand them.  When we don't talk about the things we love, people who aren't familiar with them just don't have any reference for why it is important to us...and joy is important!

And I think that if we treat something like it's shameful, we start to feel bad or guilty about liking it.  Even if it is nothing at all to be ashamed of, it's like we can't fully enjoy it because we always feel like we are sneaking about.

It can be hard to admit you like things, especially if you think you might get a negative reaction.  I've been mocked for just about everything I like, by someone, at one point in my life or another.  Some things are too girly (amusing, as I am female...), some are not girly enough (*sigh).  Some are too WooWoo, some are too dark, some are too violent, some are too explicit.  Many things are on the fringe of this or that or the other. 

But, I think that every time I have become more open, and shared something that I am into, I have found people who are also into it!  And sometimes I have found people who have never admitted liking that thing before, because they thought they were the only one!  I can pretty much promise you...no matter what it is, you are NOT the only one!

I love a lot of things!  I squee out over about anything that features witches or magic (especially if it's really cool magic or non-stereotypical witches).  I am a gamer at my core, and I just am not happy if I am not actively playing some kind of game (something that I am still working on my clinging societal guilt about....), dice make me crazy happy (especially dice with symbols), sappy love stories (I like cheap romances, the crazier the story the better, and Asian dramas...for much the same reason).  I like anything fuzzy (from cats, to blankets, to clothes, to stuffed animals), most things glittery (except for loose glitter...that stuff gets everywhere!), rocks (polished, riverstone, that random rock that I found outside that had been run over by cars and has nifty looking scratch marks...pretty much all rocks!).

I could probably list the things I like forever...I have very broad tastes!  I also get infected with other people's enthusiasm.  When a friend tells me about something they are into, I often get fascinated and end up looking into it more!  I love when people share the things that make their heart sing, even if it doesn't end up being something that calls to me.  Just something about hearing the joy in people's words, that makes my day.

And when you deny those parts of yourself, when you belittle your joy because you feel shamed by it, you diminish yourself!   You are literally cutting yourself off from some of the very best pieces of YOU! 

I think it is time for society to start accepting that people are different, are varied, and like different things...and that is OKAY!  And this may take a lot of people getting together and sharing the things they love with the world.

This is one thing that I see happening on social media ALL the time, and something I think is fantastic.  You can share pictures and stories about whatever you might like, and people all over the world can see them.  You can do this publicly or join a specialty group and share it only with people who also like the things.  You can use your real name, or have a screen name that no one in your daily life knows.

And there is something really great about sharing your excitement about things with groups of people who also are excited about the same things!  It is like that old 1+1=3 equation.  The sum of the parts is definitely not equal to the whole.

Part of what I love about sharing things I love with people who also love them (boy that's a lot of love!) is that they GET what I'm saying.  When I gush about something, they are right there with me.  As opposed to when I geek out about something to someone who doesn't get it and they kind of look at me like I'm a little crazy and might possibly need help.

I'm not perfect, there are things people are into that I just don't get.  And that's okay too, but I try really hard to be supportive, even if I don't understand.  I'm sure some of the things I enjoy aren't fun for other people (luckily for me, hubby is pretty good at this too, so even when he sometimes pokes fun at me for watching My Little Pony or another Kpop video...when I'm feeling down, he will suggest I go watch them because he knows they make me feel better).

And really, that's what it's all about.  Life should be wonderful, it should be full of things that make you smile uncontrollably, or laugh until it hurts, or cry with abandon.  Embrace the things that make your life sparkle, and reach out to other people so you can all get excited and share together!  Own your life, and own what makes it shine!

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