Heartfelt Gratitude

 

Gratitude practice is something that many people work with.  Listing a few things you are grateful for, at the end of every day, has become a sort of mainstream practice.  You can find these types of prompts in a lot of planners and journals.  Doing 30 days of gratitude is a challenge that many people take up, especially in November (because of Thanksgiving).

But, I think that we often stay on the surface, when it comes to being grateful.  We give thanks, we say the words, and on some level we feel them, but we don't really open ourselves to the fullness of the emotion.  We may enjoy the feeling of gratitude for a few moments, and even that has a lot of benefits, but before too long we move on and we let those feelings slide away.

Gratitude is also something that many people do in solitude.  If we are taking up a gratitude practice, we may think about or write down what we are grateful for, but it never goes any further than that.  We don't take time to share what we are grateful for with our family or friends, we almost hoard them.  I think often we are slightly ashamed of the things we are grateful for, especially if they are something that we feel is trivial or slightly odd.

But we also don't tend to tell other people what blessings they bring into our lives, the things that they do that we are grateful for.  We may be uncomfortable speaking up about our emotions, or we may feel that saying something puts the other person in an awkward position, or we may feel like it leaves us obligated to them...or we may think that they surely know that we are grateful for the things they do.

Sharing our gratitude can be a huge step in really embracing the essence of gratitude.  True gratitude doesn't hold any obligation.  In fact, if you feel like you need to give back, you are missing the point a little.  Gratitude isn't about making things even, you aren't paying someone back for the things you are doing, you are instead making yourself open, you are accepting with grace, you are allowing other people to care for you, and that is a very beautiful thing.  By feeling like you owe something back, you are taking a way a bit of the emotion that the person is trying to convey to you.  Instead of making it a sign of care, you are making it a transaction.  

Now, that doesn't mean you should only ever accept things from other people.  Of course you should do what you feel moved to do as a sign of caring about them.  But let those actions be from the heart, let them be based on your internal feelings, not simply a reaction to the things that person has done for you in the past.  

The easiest way to keep yourself heart-centered is to stop thinking about the actions and start focusing on the feelings.  If someone bakes you cookies when you are feeling down, of course you may love the cookies and enjoy eating them, but I bet that you are much more warmed by the fact that they thought of you, they took the effort to bake (or buy!) something for you, and then they brought it over and gave it to you.  It's actually not about the cookies at all, it's about the caring that the cookies represent.

Expressing gratitude should never be done out of obligation.  I remember, when I was little, anytime I received a gift from family, I was expected to write a thank you letter.  Of course I was grateful for the gifts received, but at that age, translating those feelings into true gratitude wasn't something I knew well how to do.  I wrote my thank yous, and in my own child-like way I did mean them, but I also pretty much wrote the same words every time:  "Thank you for the gift, I like it very much, this is what I like best about it."

Today, if I receive a gift, or someone does something extra for me, I often like to write a thank you card, but it's not about writing a rote message out of obligation anymore.  I try to capture the things I am feeling, how the gift made me feel cared for and thought about, and put those words onto paper so the other person knows how much their gift moved me.  

I think we live in a time where we don't think about thanking people so much.  We say the words, but how often do we really think about gratitude and what it means to be grateful for something.  

This is the perfect year to take a step back and look for those things in our lives that make us truly grateful.  We may be in the middle of great struggles or hard times, but I bet there are little things, even if they are few and far between, that make our hearts shine.  It might be someone taking the time to fix you a plate of food and bring it to you so that you don't have to get up or it might be a thing that is pretty and makes you smile to look at it.  Whatever the things that make your heart glad, embrace them!

Take some time to really think about what lights up your life, and then let those feelings of gratitude fill you up.  Perhaps you will feel moved to share those feelings with people who inspired them.  Or maybe you will want to share your feelings with other people who will understand (if you are grateful for a hobby or art that makes your life better you might find other fans to connect with).  Let your feelings of gratitude linger, don't just say the words and let the feelings fade.  The more you can surround yourself with the gratitude you are feeling, the more resilient you will be towards the less pleasant parts of life.

Imprinted learning

 

The first time we encounter an idea or knowledge, it can become imprinted in our brain.  That will be the thing we keep coming back to, and depending on the source of that information, this can be either a great thing or a problematic thing.

When we are lucky enough to have a good first source of information, that becomes the solid building block upon which all other knowledge is added.  We can connect future knowledge to that first source, and by remembering it, we remember the linked knowledge.

However, when our first source of information is flawed, we can end up with a lot of different struggles.  This is especially true when we don't realize that our information is not valid.  We might build up connections based on what we first learned, and then when we realize the errors in that initial imprint, we may find the linked information harder to accept (even if it is valid in it's own right).  Or, we might find that our imprint information is so contradictory to new information, we find it hard to get any other information to 'stick', because that imprint is too big and powerful.  

The good thing is that we don't have to stay stuck with that imprinted information!  There are ways to move beyond it or at least lessen it's impact in how we relate to our information.  If we are growing in our path, we are continually adding information to our knowledge stores, and being able to deal with issues that might crop up is an important tool to have.

The first step is recognizing the problem.  It can be hard to invalidate imprinted information.  It tends to form the core of our understanding of a thing, and we are loathe to discard it because it makes us feel like we are starting over (with obstacles already in place).  But learning to recognize flawed or even potentially flawed information is a huge thing, and is useful at all steps of learning.

The thing with flawed information is that it may not have been flawed when we learned it.  We might have done our work and checked our sources and found the best information at the time...but things change.  The world evolves and so does our understanding of it, and what was once the ruling theory or understanding might get debunked.  Learning to let go of old ideas takes work, it takes accepting that things change and that we can be wrong.  The key is to separate yourself from your knowledge, and to separate the idea of being wrong with the idea that you yourself are somehow 'less' because you made a mistake or understood something differently.

We may be highly influenced by our information, but we aren't the ideas we believe.  And admitting you are wrong isn't a sign of weakness, it's actually a sign of strength.  Strong, intelligent people are constantly listening and learning, they are open to new information and willing to adapt when the situation calls for it.  The more you can practice looking at things from other perspectives, the more you can develop this ability to see how the things you believe might not be true...depending on how you look at them.  And when you get to that point, it is much easier to change your perspective and your acceptance of the information you have.

But imprinting is more than just belief in knowledge.  Imprinting also includes a knee jerk reaction.  When something is imprinted in us, it is the first thing that comes to mind when we think about the subject...whether we still believe it to be true or not.  When I learned my elemental/tool correspondences, air was the wand and fire was the blade.  I have read about many different ways of assigning the tools and correspondences since then, but that is still what comes up in my brain.  It is so well imprinted that I don't even always notice when things manifest differently.  My first tarot deck has swords as air and wands as fire, and I didn't even realize this for many years!  I would see the cards (and yes, I even read the little white book), and even though the imagery is much more related to fire in wands, I would still think of air.

A big part of noticing what your imprints are is to make it a point to stop and really think about what you are experiencing, from time to time.  We make so many assumptions, as we go along, that we often don't realize where we are ignoring what is actually going on.  I have read SO many 101 books and lists of basic correspondences, I rarely actually read them anymore.  But, I do try to actually slow down and see what is being written (or shared online), because I like to stay abreast of where the current knowledge base is.  And it takes really slowing down, because you have to make sure you are reading the words that are there....and not just the ones you are expecting to be there.

Once you have figured out where your imprints are, and that some of them may not alight with your current understanding of things, then you can go in and work on changing your imprints.  This might not be something you can ever fully do, but you can go a long way towards making things better in your brain.  

One thing you can try is transferring the imprint.  The reason why we build that imprint in the first place is that we have a completely blank slate, so that first piece of information is the one that you have had the most exposure to.  Every time you think of that subject, you think of the imprint thought...and it gets reinforced.  To try to build a stronger imprint, creating a lot of repetition is helpful.  Remember back to when you were learning things in school.  If you wanted to remember something, your teachers often had you not only read it many times over, but then use the information.  The more ways you can interact with the information, the stronger the connection you will build.

Emotional resonance also carries a lot of weight.  A lot of times, a song will imprint in my brain based on where I remember hearing it first.  But I also have very strong song imprints when I hear a particular song at a specific and impactful moment.  These songs now carry those memories imprinted on them.  So, if you can build up that emotional connection, you can shift your imprint from 'first impression' to 'meaningful moment.'  This might mean building a whole ritual specifically designed to highlight the importance of a thing in your mind or it might mean working with someone else to create that strong memory that will help shift your imprint.

You can also use visualization and memorization tools to help shift an imprint.  Let's say I wanted to shift my personal connection between tools and elements, and wanted to link fire and the wand instead of linking fire to the sword.  I can spend time visualizing flaming wands or wands making fire, so that even if my first thought when I think of air is a wand, it will be a wand so strongly associated with fire that I will focus on that connection instead of the weaker initial one.  Often, the more crazy the situation you can visualize, the more likely you are to remember it.  You can even layer on other tools to help reinforce this...sketching out pictures or using songs or poems to help build these images in your head.

No matter what information you have imprinted, you can shift or change those imprints!  It will take work, but being flexible in your mind, being able to recognize when you are blinding following old information instead of actually seeing what is true and right in front of you is worth all the effort.  And these are tools that become easier the more you use them, so even if it feels daunting at first, stick with it and soon you will find yourself being able to adjust imprints to your benefit!

Big projects

 

The path we walk is a practice, and along the way we will find ourselves engaged in projects both big and small.  Small projects are easy, they are the one-off things we do, simple spells or perhaps reading about a new deity we are curious about.  But big projects can be daunting.  Trying to figure out not only where to start but how to keep going can be a real struggle.

It's November, which means NaNo (National Novel Writing Month).  For those that aren't aware of this, it's a self-motivated challenge to write 40k words entirely in the month of November.  Tons of writers (and aspiring writers) from around the world join in and challenge themselves.  And because it's a self-driven challenge, many struggle, at all steps along the way.

For some, even getting started is an issue.  40k words seems SO big (because it is!), and they may get stuck in the planning phase.  For others, they will start strong, writing tons in the first week, but then they get burnt out and struggle to write at all.  Some prefer to write in groups, or to find places outside their home to write, while others write every day, at the same time, in the same place.

Approaching any big project starts with the idea.  You have to know what you want to accomplish.  With NaNo, part of this is done, as the whole concept is the 40k word count.  But you have to pick what you want to write about.  In your path, you decide what you study and how deep those studies will go.  Once you have picked the topic you want to explore, you have to determine if you want to do a broad study or a deep one.  A broad study might teach you enough to recognize the appropriate terms and know enough to have a conversation about it, while a deep study might be what you need if you want to focus on that area or maybe someday teach about it.  The thing about an idea is that it can change as you go along.  You might start broad and realize you are keenly interested in the topic, and so you want to go deep in certain areas.

After you have your idea, you need to make a plan.  This is where it really starts to get personal.  Different people thrive with different types of plans.  In writing, there are people who really need a detailed plot and outline.  Coming up with this is vital to their writing.  Other people struggle with this structured of an approach, and write best from the hip.  But even if you don't want to plan out the whole story, having a plan for when and where and how you will write is necessary.  The thing about plans is they can be quite fluid or very strict.  You might tell yourself you will write during specific hours, while in a particular place, or you may just plan on writing something every day.

The same goes for any big project you are trying to tackle.  Some people need to break it down into a series of smaller steps, and plan out each of those.  Having a full outline, before they begin, helps them stay on track and keep everything structured in their mind.  Other people find that they just need to think about the one thing they need to do right now.  And if their first thought is too big, they pick which part of that one thing they can work on.  Once that thing is done, they find the next thing to work on.

Once you have your plan, it all comes down to execution.  And again, there are many ways that this works for different people.  Some people work in spurts, so they might spend all day working on their project, but only work on it one day a week.  For other people, that is too much all at once, and too much time off.  They may need to work on their project a little bit every day.  The key is paying attention to how your work flows when you work in different ways.  You may find yourself frustrated after working for an hour and then needing to stop to do other things.  This might indicate that you need to carve out bigger chunks of time to work.  Or, you may find that if you don't have specific times to work, you get caught up in other stuff and forget, so making a clear schedule may be helpful to you.

When at this stage, it's also important to keep checking in with how you feel about the whole project.  Sometimes we find ourselves stuck in something we thought we wanted to do, but the further along it gets, the more we realize that working on it is making us miserable.  That means it's time to sit and reflect, to adjust if necessary.  We may have thought we wanted to study an entire pantheon of deities, but after we got through the first handful, we realize that we aren't as invested in the rest.  Maybe we only want to do deep research on a few deities in the pantheon, but we want a broad knowledge of others, and then there may be some we just keep in a list (in case we might want to read up on them later).

Adjusting your plan is not the same as giving up.  Giving up is when you aren't willing to do the work to get what you want.  Adjusting your plan is when you realize that you don't actually want the thing you are working towards.  Especially when it comes to working your path, you don't want to be spending time and energy working towards things that aren't aligned with what you truly want to be doing.  If you find something uninteresting, stop, adjust, and head off in a new direction.  It's okay to pause in studying something, or set a topic aside for the time being.  Sometimes you may find that you are drawn back to that subject at a later date (or after learning some other stuff that makes it more appealing), but sometimes you just realize that your interests lie elsewhere.

Big projects can be truly rewarding.  When we have great interest in a subject and we want to connect better with it, spending time on building that understanding and connection can be fabulous.  But if we try to approach big projects in the wrong way, they can crush us.  It's well worth taking the time to approach these big projects in the right way....the way that is right for you.  Pay attention to how you feel along the way, be brutally honest with yourself, adjust as necessary, and it will all pay off!

Witching the world

 

This has been a year.  Before this year, I often said I didn't like talking about politics.  This year, politics and current events have been so present that it's hard to avoid talking about them, and I have definitely written a lot more this year about things that are going on than I have in the past.  And I think I am starting to change my mind...about not talking about or 'staying out' of politics.

We talk a lot about inner work, but rarely do we talk seriously about outer work.  If inner work is getting to know your Self, and working with your shadows and becoming the person you want to be, then outer work is about getting to know the World (and what is truly happening), figuring out what the problems are, and helping to create the world you want to live in.

Yes, this sounds pretty radical, and I think that is okay (it's a bit sad that wanting a better world is radical, but hey, we work with what we've got).  It may force you to face some ethical issues involving your perceptions of harm, your choice to work magic on others (without their permission), or even how you feel about disrupting 'the natural flow' (or what that even means..).

But, I think we are starting to realize that the world is evolving in ways that many of us are vehemently against.  I'm reminded of the quote, "All that is necessary for evil to succeed is that good men do nothing."  I think that too many of us good people don't want to make waves.  And by good people I mean people who honestly want the best for the world, for their neighbors and friends, and even their enemies.  Part of respecting others, and respecting other opinions is allowing people to have vastly different ideas than we do.

Where I think the problem lies is that there is something very different from wanting to encourage people to have their own perspectives and opinions...and letting people make choices for others based on their own perspective.  This is where I really have issues with some Christian folks.  It's not their faith at all, it's the fact that they want to use legal means to force everyone to live by the rules of their faith.  It's not longer a belief or an opinion, now it's oppression.

And I think we've somewhat lost sight of what oppression really is.  We see all kinds of very privileged people crying out that they are being repressed or that they aren't allowed to believe what they believe in, and yet almost always they are actually upset that other people aren't following what they believe.  In their eyes, they don't see a difference between a person who is actually being oppressed, someone who is legitimately not being treated as an equal or who is being denied basic rights, and whatever fluff thing they were told they couldn't do.  It's like a toddler crying because they can't eat all the candy in a jar and trying to say it's the same as a starving child crying because they haven't been giving any food in three days.

Now, a lot of people will say that we need to focus on ourselves, that change should start from within.  And I fully agree with that.  But note that it says change STARTS from within.  It doesn't end within.  We need to start with our inner work, so we know what we truly believe, we know what things are vital to our being, we know where we stand.  But then we need to reach out, because if we only work on inner work, there are plenty of people in the world who have no problem hurting other people just for the heck of it (or because they are selfish and want all the stuff for themselves).

Now, I'm not going to tell anyone they need to start cursing people they don't agree with or any type of aggressive response in any way.  There are many, many ways to approach an issue....at least as many ways as there are people, and probably a lot more!  If I see someone being attacked, sure, I can try to take out the attacker.  I can also try to help the person escape, I can call the authorities, I can rally onlookers to help me intimidate the attacker, I can try to talk the attacker down.  Some of these ways do directly effect the attacker, but some don't.  We all need to do what we feel comfortable with, but I think we need to do something.

 

To toss out another quote, "With great power comes great responsibility."  I think that every person has power, in different ways, and that we are responsible to each other to use our power to make the world better.  We are starting to see just how many problems are created when we treat life as if it were 'every man for themselves' or as if it were a game to see who can hoard the most stuff.  We know that what we are doing (and what we have been doing) isn't working, so I think it's time for a change.

 

We work magic, we create change in the world, change based on our will.  And though we may not be strong enough to change the whole world on our own, if we don't try, nothing will change.  And the more of us that work to make the world better, the more tiny ripples start shifting...and those ripples can build on each other and become waves.  

 

It is time to join together the inner and outer work of our practice.  First, we find our footing, but then we make a stand!  Decide what things you are passionate about, what issues you want to work on fixing, and then do the work to figure out how to approach them!  Find others who share your passion, who want to change the same things you do, and work together...for we will find strength in numbers.  It is time we stop being polite and turning a blind eye to the things we see happening all around us.  It is time we stand up for what we believe in.  It is time we start witching the world!