Wednesday, February 3, 2021

Imbolc: honoring the home


 Imbolc heralds the spring and new growth, but as it is also associated with Brigid, it has deep connections to the hearth and home.  Home is something that is much more than just the roof over our heads.  It is a feeling of being safe and secure, of fitting in....it is a place that we belong to.  And this is the perfect time to honor that home!


It is really easy to take our home for granted.  We see all the pictures of fancy houses online, and maybe we wish we had a little more room.  We see perfectly sculpted gardens and we might wish our yard was more well kempt.  We see designer interiors and we wonder if we will ever see all of our floor or if it's time to replace those pillows that are getting a bit ragged.  


Many of us started off with very little.  Whether we were going away to college, joining the military or moving into our very first apartment, we probably didn't have a full set of anything, let alone enough to fill a home.  We might not have had much money...or we may have thought that it was much more fun to spend what we did have on fun things...not on stuff like silverware and furniture.


And then you blink and turn around and years (decades?) have passed and you maybe realize that you still have a good chunk of hand-me-down or second-hand stuff.  Now, there is nothing wrong with previously owned things!  I'm a huge fan of not only vintage stuff (old things have their own charm...) but also being thrifty.  I love looking at used stores, searching for those really unique items that you just can't find at the big box stores.


What I think is important is that, whenever we are able, we pick things for our home because they bring us joy.  I read something recently that was talking about someone's home as if it were a carefully cultivated museum, with each item in the house having personal meaning and value.  And how many of us can say that!  


It can definitely be tempting to settle for a cheap set of dish towels (especially when the nice ones you really like are three times as much if not more!), but I think we often neglect to remember how much being surrounded by stuff we truly love effects our mood..and thus the rest of our lives.  It's not something you do overnight, most of us can't afford to just go out and buy all new stuff.  And sometimes it's a process to find just the right lamp (or coffee pot).  


I think there are two ways to go about this in a healthy way...and the great thing is you can do both!  Firstly, when stuff breaks or just flat out needs replacing, always try to find something you really enjoy, if possible.  This might be a process, you might not be able to get your dream stuff right away (trust me, I have expensive taste!), but each time you can try to find the most interesting or 'you' thing that is in your price range.  And sometimes it's worth that splurge, knowing that you will be using this item every day, and thinking about how it will make you smile.


But you can also treat yourself a couple of times a year.  Maybe it's something you want to do for your birthday or for the holidays, or maybe you build a habit of doing it when you feel sad.  Then you look around your house, find something that you don't really like...and replace it.  You may have to do some emotional letting go.  We all cling to stuff for a variety of reasons, and maybe that item was a gift (but you really think it's ugly), or an inherited item (that might not work anymore) and you feel guilty or bad about letting it go.


One thing I have found is a great way to help ease the transition of letting go of such items is to photograph them.  Especially with digital pictures now, you can keep the memory alive...and let go of the item.  If you aren't quite ready to actually get it out of your house just yet, you can move it into a closet for now (it's kind of amazing how easy it is to finally let go of things after they have lived in a closet for years...)


To take all this a step further, it's not even just about editing the stuff in your house.  It's also about your attitude towards your home.  Sometimes we live in a place but we don't take ownership of it.  I'm not talking about renting, but really claiming a place as your own.  And we can feel it, when we treat a space we are in as if it weren't ours.  I actually dislike talking in those terms, because I don't think of my home as belonging to me...rather I belong to my home.  It's the place that I fit, because I tend it.


Tending the home is more than just sweeping the floors and clearing out junk that doesn't belong.  There is a sense of wanting to make it the best it can be.  Even if you are renting or crashing at a friend's place, there are little things you can do to fit better into the space you are in.  And a lot of it does come back to keeping things clean...because allowing things to become dirty is a clear sign of disrespect.


And while cleaning isn't my favorite thing in the world, it is much more bearable when I stop thinking of it as 'having to dust' and remind myself that I am making our home a nicer place.  It's like the difference between doing something because you are told to and doing it because you want to do it (or because you want the outcome of doing the thing).  Tending the home becomes and act of love, not just for your house, but also for all the people (and furpeople) who live inside of it!


So this year, as we start spring (isn't it funny how this time is often thought of as spring cleaning time...), and we honor the hearth and home...and prepare for Valentines...spend some time shining love into your home.  Find the things that need tending and work on them.  You don't have to do it all at once, you can do one small thing at a time.  Don't get caught up in what you are doing, rather focus on why you are doing it.  And enjoy the cozy energy of your home!

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